Date: 3/14/2005



...................A delightful interview.

Reporter: Mr. Gandhi, what do you think of the Indian Army, Navy and the Air Force?

Don’t mention them. They were always an embarrassment to my grandfather. They should all be disbanded. These “rascals” carrying weapons and munitions are such a disgrace to our Land of Peace and non violence. They project India as a war mongering nation.

They are also an insult to the sacred memory of my grand father who always breathed and spoke of "AHIMSA PARMO DHARMA."

Reporter: How will you defend your land in case of aggression or invasion?

There is no need to defend anything. My grandfather had renounced all possessions. Perhaps you are ignorant. His motto was TYAAG.

When the Japanese were advancing towards Calcutta (now Kolkata) my grandfather advised the Indian Army to lay down their arms. He urged the people to lie down in front of the advancing Japanese tanks. He was sure that after crushing a couple of people to death, remorse will hit Emperor Hiro Hito and the Japanese army would withdraw immediately.

My grandfather had nothing to defend, but just his loin cloth, a pair of slippers, a pair of glasses and a walking stick. None wanted these things. So he did not have to fight anybody for them.

But when it comes to land and cities, he used to say, "We are all children of One God and all land and cities are common to all mankind."

Reporter: Have you visited any armoured regiment or an infantry battalion?

No, why should I? I have said these are evil places where men of violence live. These men are like "RAAK-SHASAAS" (devils) and have nothing to do with our civilisation and secularism.

I wish to say no more except that if my grand father were alive today, he would have gone on fast unto death demanding the disbandment of Indian Armed Forces. He would urge the Jawans to handspin cotton ("khadi") or till the soil for crops.

Such misuse of manpower is sheer wastage of national wealth and resources! It is evil to make weapons and it is even bigger evil to put these into hands of young men, give them uniform and then train them to kill.

Reporter: What do you think of the post of Defence Minister?

It is wastage of a good cabinet minister who could attend to something useful in life.

If you give a knife to a child and send him to school, he is bound to stab someone. Similarly if you create the post of Minister of Defence and then give guns, rockets and missiles to men who are trained to kill, they are bound to start a war.

Reporter: How would you recover North Kashmir that is supposed to be Indian by right and Constitution?

It is foolish to claim anything by right. Is your life by right? I have said before that land is common to all. So if they want it, let them have it.

But if you wish to take it back, then it is best to plead with them. If they do not agree, then go on fast unto death, and die. This will make them repent and return what they have grabbed.

My grandfather admired Jesus for saying, "Offer the other cheek." By this moral code, if they have taken North Kashmir, we should give them South Kashmir, too.

We are being very evil towards the Kashmiris to keep them divided. In fact, my grandfather stunned his close friend, Mr. MA Jinnah who wanted Lahore, by saying, “You can take Delhi, too.”

Jinnah hesitated and said, “It will be too much to kill so many infidels. We shall do so by stages, if you don't mind.”

My grandfather congratulated Mr. Jinnah for his wisdom, kindness and patience.

Today all the Hindus and Sikhs still living in Bharat owe their existence to Mr. Jinnah’s refusal to accept my grandfather’s generous offer to occupy the whole of India, not just one third of her territory.

My grandfather knew of danger to his life in our intolerant Hindu land after he stood up for Pakistan. He was wise enought to whisper his last Will, a kind of Trishul, into Pandit Jawaharlal Nehru's ears.

It was, (1) “Never fire first. If you have to, declare cease fire at once. And above all, never retaliate to any provocation, to any raid, attack and invasion.

(2) Be ready to compromise, be ready to charm and be ready to surrender and save as many lives as you can. And,

(3) Practise “Hindu Muslim Bhai Bhai" not just by chanting, but by conceding top key posts to the Muslims, preferably that of the President.

That also means if any general or dictator comes from Pakistan, embrace him like your own brother. If a Muslim abducts and rapes a Hindu maiden, her father and brothers should go and embrace him with love. They should thank him for relieving the family of the worry about her dowry.

That is why NO good follower of my grandfather ever mentions Partition. The word will only annoy the Indian Muslims, and may even infuriate them to attack India again and murder every infidel.

Our Constitution reflects the true spirit of my grandfather. It does not contain the word “PARTITION”. It lays no claim to the territory surrendered in 1947. It disregards the fact that India is no more “Akhand Bharat.” In fact, it treats the Muslims at par with the native Sikhs and places Mohammed of Arabia above all the native home-grown "Prophets" like Sri Ram in Ayodhya and Guru Nanak in Sri Nankana Sahib, now in Pakistan, thanks to holy spirit of my grandfather.

Reporter: Is the present Government of India living up to the high ideals of your grandfather?

Yes, it is. It is to the credit of Pandit Nehru and his offspring that they follow Gandhiji’s wishes to the letter.

After we conquered East Bengal, we realised that its occupation would cause great sadness among the people who hate Secularism and Hindus, being used to living under Constitution by Koran.

So Mrs. Indira Gandhi soothed their souls by returing the Province to them promptly, despite opposition by fundamentalist Hindus.

Secularism does not mean that we cause offence or annoyance to the Muslims. Hence we are pleased to see Bangladesh under Islamic Law and her Hindus reduced and degraded once again. Where else can you find such high morality and genuine love of peace?

Reporter. Thank you. I hope you become the President of India. Many natives of this land don't like Abdul Kalam since he has a "Jehadi" name with the promise of violence in the future. The people of Bharat, therefore, wish to keep Sonia Gandhi but dump Abdul Kalam.

Reporter: Why do you prefer "Rashtramata" Sonia to Supreme Commander Abdul?

The former has endeared herself to people by dropping her real surname KHAN, and has adopted the surname of my grandfather. She regards him as the beacon of light. On the other hand many secular Indians believe that Deception, Treachery and Violence as preached and practised by warring Mohammed of Arabia, act as the inspiration of the latter.

Reporter: Did your grandfather get on well with Pandit Nehru?

O yes, extremely well. Nehru won his heart, mind and soul when he simply went along with the unconditional surrender of one third of India. Though he was a barrister from London, he refused to advance any argument in favour of keeping India united. He neither suggested referendum nor transfer of population. It was all a peacuful affair like settlement of a family dispute between brothers.

Reporter: What about the massacres and those endless refugee convoys pouring into India?

It is all exaggering and media stories like the massacre of six million Jews. Had there been a massacre our present prime minister, who hails from Pakistan, would have mentioned it at least once. Our renowned journalist Kuldip Nayar and the illustrious "Son of Punjab" Inder Kumar Gujral, ex prime minister would also have written or spoken about it.

My grandfather put his foot down against the mischievous and provocative idea of building a Hindu Holocaust Museum.

Reporter: What would your grandfather have said about the Temple in Ayodhya?

Pure mischief by die hard fundamentalist Hindus who wish to provoke the peace loving Muslims of our country to declare Jehad without thinking of the consequences.

Reporter: One last question. What is the secret of your robustness?

I owe my physical robustness to the drink popularised by Shri Morarji Desai and my mental robustness to goat’s milk that nourished my grandfather to strength. You saw how he chased out the British from India.

Reporter: You are right, Sir. The whole world was impressed by your illustrious grandfather. The Pakistanis and the Bangladeshis, in particular, owe their sovereignty and independence to him.

May you live a hundred years, acting as a bright star in the dark Indian sky.

.........................March 14, 2005.